Substance

Tell me can you see me? Is there something to believe in now?
Cause this vessel is just empty and I can’t see past this…

Decades of slavery hoping that I somehow could change the marks of my birth
But I’m bound to the same haunted hole; with nothing to find
But the memories and mistakes and things I could never take back
Still I swear that none this is me. I swear that none of this is me

Hunting after the substance: just like dream – whisping away like my fantasies.
Nothing static but the fog that covers my sight
So close to capture the one thing I need to be
But my soul just keeps evading me, a spirit that just cannot sleep

Tell me can you see me? Is there something to believe in now?
Cause this vessel is just empty and I can’t see past this…

Complex story, a plot that blows me away, and leads me astray
Like a character who can’t see the satire made of his life
Chasing after the icon that defines my being, it’s all that I am
But I don’t know that….
I don’t know that..
I don’t know who I am

Whoever said that we should see
And know our true identity
I’m sorry, it’s not that easy
As all the years have passed me by
I’m starting now to realize
I don’t know me, I just don’t know me
With every breath I gasp to take
I see the irony of fate
That I’m dying; I was born dying
The time it’s taken me to learn
That all I’ve done is just return
To my lifeless, hopeless, empty self

This is the lot and the hollowness we feel inside
When we don’t have you…

——————————————————————–
Lately I’ve been finding myself in a place where it is difficult to determine some of the things that make up the core of my character. Determining one’s beliefs, strengths and weaknesses are difficult things to do – and it is more likely to be a lifelong process. Nevertheless, sometimes I feel like I’ve gotten so far to just return back to zero, and that’s a disheartening thought.

Throughout the piece there exists this constant searching for the intangible soul. This is the “substance” that drives us, makes us human, and gives us heart. The symbols of bondage at the beginning present this idea that when we’re consumed by our sinful natures, finding our souls (and their fulfilment) is especially difficult – almost hopeless. Even though this song speaks of despair – and outright hopelessness, there’s the realization that this is the result of my own distance from God. Indeed, without the touch of the divine, we are hollow.

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